Mental Health Awareness Week

No worries, I want to advocate for taking steps to help yourself, it took a long time to take those steps myself but I’m there now.

What steps do you take?

Within my supervisions within my first few weeks and months with Right at Home Isle of Wight I brought it up. Jennifer realised early on that I was struggling. Once I brought it up it became an open conversation and I didn’t have to keep repeating or explaining myself. Vicky said to give her a ring if I ever needed anything in which I did. I went off for a month and then returned with lower hours which took the pressure off and then I started slowly bringing my hours back up.

I feel like Vicky and everyone in the office are open about talking about mental health and so when I’m struggling, I can open up and talk too. I haven’t had that in past companies, but speaking about it is the best thing to do for yourself. Having a positive job has helped, not feeling judged every day.

Do you think stigmas make it hard to talk about your mental health?

I am an open book.

There has always been a stigma “you’ll get over it”, “pull yourself together”… people sometimes place the blame on you for the way you feel, but it’s just a chemical imbalance in your brain.

Having people round you who will support you or give the extra push when you need it helps. Positive people around you help you make positive decisions.

The whole job has made a massive difference, talking to everyone has allowed me to be myself. If I’m having a bad day, I can let them know. They don’t expect me to get over it, they support me through it.

Some people are scared to understand mental health or support people through their struggles. But the things is, they don’t have to carry the weight of the problem to help. Just being aware, giving a hug or having a cup of tea, or having a separate conversation to take my mind away from it makes me feel better.

Mind are campaigning for accessible support when people need it #NoMindLeftBehind. What has your experience been of mental health support?

Quite frankly it’s been abhorrent. I have struggled with services both on the Isle of Wight and in Portsmouth. I’ve been in contact with mental health services since I was 13/14 years old, CAHMS transferred me to adult services. But then I was passed around service to services, too bad for one service and not bad enough for another. There have been times when they focus on me doing group therapy, I end up making friends with everyone else but not focusing on the therapy, it does not work for everybody. I tried to stay engaged with the service up until turning 25 and then I gave up. I then went through it by myself, using medication through GP and being self-aware of my mental health… where I’ve not had the support from services, I have had to be self-aware. My family have been incredibly supportive. Living in Portsmouth was a very positive step in me getting my independence, but it was really tough being away from my family. Living with my parents for the time being has really allowed me to get myself together and it takes the pressure off of some things like certain chores and bills (though I understand it isn’t like this for everyone!).

How do you be self-aware? How do you manage your own mental health?

It’s taken years and I’m in a place being healthy again. A lot of people hope for one quick fix, but it is really not that, you have to do little tiny things to build up to feeling better. A scary thought I had was that things wouldn’t just click in my head and I’d be better; the thought of having to put work into getting better can be daunting however it’s completely worth it.

Brush your teeth, having a shower – at the minimum have more than just one shower a week! Make those little steps and they’re moving you in the right direction. Keeping on top of your own personal care. Giving other people personal care at work is easy, then you go home and do it for yourself as well… there is no point doing it for everyone else and not do it for yourself.

The way I start it, I used to have random rare bursts of energy and I use those times to make myself feel good- shower, self care, have little wins and continuously trying to do those. I bullet journal- it feels so good to tick something off in there.

For the longest time I hated exercise, now I’m going to the gym, some times I really don’t want to go but I do it. A group of us signed up together and now I go my myself. In the gym everyone is worried about themselves, no one is actually looking at you.

Around Christmas I was finding tiny things to keep my mind occupied, crafts, ones that don’t require a lot of energy, little things like that.

But remember it’s okay to fall.

What do you do when you fall?

Be forgiving and kind to yourself. If I fall, I give myself a day or two to recover. Then keep going. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard to find that energy to keep going but the support around me has really helped.

I’ve changed medication so I’m stable now, on my old medication I was on it for 8 years and I could be very up and down. I knew the signs when I was starting to struggle, the first thing that would go was my anxiety; the first thing I would do was not want to do something i.e. cook, shower, go outside. Sometimes, if in the depths of it, you just have to ride it out, but you come out the other side every time.

I think people are scared of medication, having the correct support from your GP is important. Finding the right medication is important, it changed everything and it’s had a positive effect on me. It’s given me the ability to take extra steps to help myself. Get out of bed, take self care.

How do you ask for help?

It can be difficult, I did it through my GP but I know for many people phone calls can be hard, I used to struggle with phone calls, I am a bit better now. I actually did it through an E-Consult. Doing little things like that can be so helpful if the GP has that service, they will give you a call or text and make an appointment. Also, talking to your closest people around you just saying “look I’m struggling, can you come round” or you say to them “do you want to go out for a meal?” get away from the place you’re sat in. It takes time to build up the strength and confidence to open up to someone. But once you do, it’s the best thing.

And remember, you don’t have to go straight to the GP like I did, talk to a friend or a colleague or your family.

What advice would you give to others?

Keep an open mind – that’s both the person who is struggling and other people in their life.

Check in on your friends, even if its someone you don’t talk to often, ask how they are doing. It can be the difference for someone.

If you need help:

• call Samaritans on 116 123 (UK-wide)

• text SHOUT to 85258 (UK-wide)

• call C.A.L.L. on 0800 132 737 (Wales only)

• call SANEline on 0300 304 7000 (4.30pm–10pm every day)

• call Papyrus HOPELINEUK on 0800 068 4141 (24 hours, 7 days a week), email pat@papyrus-uk.org or text 07786 209 697

These services are for anyone who's struggling.

They won't judge you.

Urgent Treatment

Go to A&E

Call 111

Call 999